Dreaming of Success...

In August '21 - I wrote…

By how much you earn? By where you live? By how little you have to work? Or by the size and make of your car?

Why are we programmed to see objects as a sign of success? And hey, before you say it, I’m just as ‘signs of success programmed’ as the next person.

 

I mean, the car thing has always got me. And It’s possibly a young man’s game and like most, I was suckered in during my sales career where a ‘Ford Mondeo Ghia X’ was perceived as the pinnacle of car hierarchy. And on finally getting my career-eager hands on the keys I found it cornered like a shopping trolley and was really an old man’s car!

 

For the record, at only three days old it was stolen off my drive for parts and all that was left was a bodyshell in a remote field gateway that was taken away to an early company car scrapyard grave. And being success-status-driven I went to the next level reaching BMW status where you find that everyone else on the road, even though they don’t know you, instantly think you’re a @@@@.

It’s kinda sad that we mark success by the outward signs of wealth rather than by what we’ve achieved or by what we’ve done with other people.

You see it’s the things you can’t see that really matter. It’s not where you’ve been, it’s how you’ve done it that counts. It’s experience that makes you smart and being smart leads to success. Success that you simply can’t buy and that you earn, over time.

Now, we are not all world beating athletes, but we can outplay our own dreams and succeed in areas we once thought were unachievable. I know – been there and got the T-Shirt…many times over.

I found that success comes from hours and hours of training, focus and determination and if you feel you have yet to succeed in life, make a plan and start to make it happen. You probably won’t get anything tangible to show for your efforts but inwardly you’ll know what true success feels like and how it’s measured when you look back on your life in the future.

Which is all nice and cosy but, maybe success should be measured more by how you feel. Are you truly happy? Do you feel fulfilled? Have you surrounded yourself with the right people? Are you living in the moment?

If you are, you’ve found success – if not maybe it’s time to measure up.

1,120 Marathons - 261 Ultras - 15 Marathon des Sables - 9 Guinness World Records

Blue Monday - New Order

Well Blue Monday is upon us, officially the most depressing day of the year as originally defined by Cardiff Based tutor, Cliff Arnall. Being the third Monday of the month post-Christmas, in a five-week month, it’s not surprising that it’s a day when it’s hard to be enthused, especially as another week at the grindstone beckons.
 
However, as someone that suffers with SAD (Seasonal Adjustment Disorder) I see Blue Monday as another day closer to the Spring Equinox and use these dark days of Winter as a foundation block for fitness and planning my year ahead. Maybe it’s an age thing but I’m very conscious of impending Springtime and there are already signs of an awakening and surfacing of Daffodils, Magnolia trees in bud and even blossom on some of the more sheltered trees in the city.
 
You see, it’s not all bad, and if I’m being honest, I’d always opt for a bright and sunny Springtime Day than an August Bank Holiday wash out. The longer daylight days are already happening!
 
The ‘Bluest’ thing perhaps about today, is wishing your life away, imagining you are somewhere else, with someone else in another time. So why not make this ‘Blue Monday’ the best Monday ever and make some decisions that will brighten all of the Mondays you’ll ever have again.

And as Bernard Sumner sings in ‘Blue Monday’ - 'How does that feel?'
 
1,118 Marathons - 261 ULTRAS - 9 Guinness World Records - 15 Marathon des Sables

A Second Life...

Today marks my 28th year of Sobriety, something I'm very proud of. And to celebrate, I thought I'd share a story from my good friend Ronald - just one of the amazing people I've managed to help during my alcohol-free running journey.

Ron writes...

Seventeen years ago today, I was running a 65km Ultramarathon from Offenburg to Baden-Baden in Germany and at the time I was 38 years old.

 

It was a week on from my last horrible, and as usual disastrous, booze session. A date I will never forget as my father died on 4^th December 2018. It had been in the same pub where I’d started my drinking career more than 20 years earlier - the one where my father had ‘taught’ me how to drink when I was about fifteen. I’d been so drunk that night I lost my wallet containing 2000€ and slept rough in minus temperatures before being picked up in the morning by the Police.

Over the years, my drinking had been so heavy and frequent, that I wasn’t far away from being homeless. I was, and still am, a Professional gambler, living on my own without rules. It was a free and fun lifestyle but due to my heavy drinking, my financial situation was diminishing. So, to save money, I bought a motorhome, which was also provided a convenient place to collapse in when I was drunk but also transported me to running races.

Somehow, I was still able to run Marathons and Ultra-Marathons such as the 80km Swiss Alpine and even two Ironmans. I was a binge-drinker having heavy sessions which could last up to three weeks being drunk every day and then have long sober breaks in between of up to three months. At my lowest point, I drank in shady bars and with homeless people in the park.

A week after my last season, I still felt hungover, yet I decided to drive to Offenburg to run with a group of people for my sixth ultra of the year. I still don’t understand how I was able doing that over so many years despite drinking so heavily. Although it wasn’t a usual kind of event as most of the participants had problems with alcohol, drugs, relationships, or mental issues despite being able to run 65km and as a group running together.

I ran alongside a runner from Great Britain who jogged along at a very economical pace. Every 10kms there was a break for food and water, where we started chatting. His name was Rory Coleman a record-breaking runner, who’d had similar drinking issues to mine. We talked for the rest of the run sharing our life-stories.

When we arrived in Baden-Baden during the Christmas Market it was snowing. Most of the runners, including myself, had tears in their eyes (like I do now, writing this article). And in that moment, it became clear to me that I would never touch a drop of alcohol again. In a moment my fifteen years of fighting alcohol was over, and I’ve never looked back since. Up until then I’d always thought of quitting, but never had the mindset.

Since then, I’ve never had the urge to drink again.

That day changed my live completely. I disconnected from my drinking friends (including my drinking parents) and stopped squandering my money in bars. And although Rory and I have never met since in person, those few hours together changed my life. Today I received a congratulatory email marking seventeen years of sobriety. Rory sends me one every 11th of December that says, ‘Well Done Ron’.

I now live a life of awareness, meditation, spirituality and Buddhism. I enjoy family-time with my young daughter still in my motorhome with two cats, a laptop and a small e-piano for company. My mission is to save people who are struggling with alcohol and depression, so I can repay my debt to Rory - the one person that helped me, and that can help you if you are struggling like I was back in 2004.

Rory Coleman - 28 years' dry - 1,118 Marathons - One Life