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| 'I was taught to fight, taught to win' - Gabriel |
Our brains are wired to avoid pain and conserve energy, and we are designed to prioritise survival, not self-improvement. In primeval times, conserving energy was essential. Food was scarce, danger was everywhere, and unnecessary effort could mean unnecessary risks. As a result, we evolved to favour self-preservation and avoid anything that felt physically or emotionally painful.
Today, even though modern challenges aren’t about survival, the brain still interprets discomfort, whether it’s physical strain during exercise or emotional discomfort during failure, as a threat. Giving up is the brain’s way of restoring safety. The easiest path is always the one that requires the least energy, and quitting nearly always requires less energy than carrying on.
When something becomes too difficult, stressful, or overwhelming, the body activates its fight-or-flight response. This system was designed to help prehistoric man escape immediate danger, and it reacts the same way to modern stressors such as deadlines, setbacks, or challenging goals.
Stress triggers cortisol, adrenaline, and other chemicals that sharpen focus but also elevate anxiety and discomfort. Because the brain tries to reduce stress as quickly as possible, quitting becomes the appealing option. It’s the fastest way to remove the stressor. Long-term goals, by contrast, require tolerating stress for extended periods of time, something that feels unnatural to the body’s protective system.
Giving up provides something very powerful - instant relief! Relief is one of the most potent emotional rewards the brain can experience. It eliminates pressure, removes expectations, reduces fear of failure, and restores a sense of control. It’s so emotionally soothing that it outweighs the long-term reward of perseverance.
Folk struggle with delayed gratification and our brains respond more strongly to immediate outcomes than to future ones. A future payoff, no matter how meaningful, cannot compete with the immediate emotional comfort that quitting offers in the moment.
Some people have constant negative thoughts such as ‘I’m not good enough. I always fail. I’m not smart enough. This is just who I am. Other people can do it, but I can’t’ etc.
These beliefs often originate from childhood experiences, past traumas, or repeated failures. Once formed, they shape how people interpret challenges. Even small obstacles can feel like confirmation of inadequacy. If a person believes they are destined to fail, quitting doesn’t feel like giving up, it feels like accepting reality. Negative thoughts make quitting feel logical, even inevitable.
Most folk aren’t actually afraid of failing itself, they’re afraid of what failure means about them. Failure evokes shame, embarrassment, judgment, and the painful belief of incapability and because quitting usually happens before failure is final, it allows people to protect their ego.
If you quit, you can tell yourself, ‘I could have succeeded if I wanted to. I just didn’t care enough, or it wasn’t worth it anyway.’
Psychologically, humans pay more attention to setbacks than successes. This negativity bias evolved to help people detect threats, but it distorts perception in modern life. When working towards a goal, the mind emphasises what isn’t working, what’s difficult, and what’s imperfect. Meanwhile, small improvements go unnoticed.
Because folk often can’t see their progress clearly, they feel like they’re putting in effort without getting results. This creates frustration, disappointment, and disillusionment. Quitting becomes easy because the mind convinces itself that continuing won’t make a difference.
Modern culture promotes instant results - instant entertainment, instant communication, instant answers. This conditions folk to expect instant transformation in every part of life. But meaningful goals, whether emotional, physical, educational, or professional, require slow, consistent effort.
When progress doesn’t match expectations, frustration grows. The gap between effort and reward feels unfair, and quitting becomes the simplest way to escape that discomfort.
People often assume that sticking with something is purely a matter of willpower.
But willpower isn’t constant, it’s a resource that gets depleted throughout the day. Making decisions, dealing with stress, juggling responsibilities, and managing emotions all drain willpower. By the time people need it most, they often have very little left to give.
When willpower runs low, decisions default to the easiest option, which is usually quitting. It’s not a failure of character - it’s a predictable outcome of how the brain’s self-regulation systems work. Success depends far more on environment and habits than on self-control, but most people try to rely on self-control alone.
In many cultures, success is glorified while the struggle behind it is hidden. Folk see achievements but not the setbacks, doubts, and failures that preceded them. Because the process is invisible, people assume that difficulty means they’re doing something wrong. When things get tough, quitting becomes easy because difficulty feels like a sign of personal inadequacy rather than a normal and necessary part of growth.
Pursuing something meaningful requires vulnerability. It requires being seen trying. It requires risking disappointment, criticism, and exposure. Quitting eliminates vulnerability. It allows folk to retreat to a place of emotional safety, even if that safety comes at the cost of fulfilment.
Ultimately, giving up is easy because it aligns with our biology, our emotions, our fears, our expectations, and the protective systems built into our brains.
It offers immediate relief, preserves self-esteem, avoids stress, and shields us from vulnerability. In contrast, persistence demands discomfort, resilience, delayed gratification, and the willingness to confront failure, all of which require conscious effort to override instinctive patterns.
Understanding why giving up is easy doesn’t mean people are doomed to quit. It means they can learn to recognise the forces at play, design environments that support persistence, and build habits that make continuing easier than giving up.
However it all starts with acknowledging the truth that giving up isn’t a flaw, it’s just being human.
1,229 Marathons - 290 Ultras - 18 MDS - 10 GWR - 0 Times Given Up
