We’re often told that it’s okay to be ‘afraid’. Hmm much better than being totally shit-scared IMHO. But how do we let being afraid (aka defeat and failure) in at the precise moment whe things are getting tough - and if anything at a time when we need to try even harder? Sure, being afraid is very natural. Fear is part of our personal defence mechanism that makes us careful and highlights danger. It’s a feeling that can range from a slightly raised heartrate through to a full-on panic attack. I know from my own experiences what that’s like and I’m sure you do too.
Are we more afraid of the ‘Unknown’ or the ‘Known’ or is feeling of being ‘afraid’ actually a learned response of our past?
In our childhood, the majority of our learning comes from teachers, parents, other relatives, mentors, etc. add to it years of life experience and it’s not surprising we all have our phobias. For instance, I know I’m afraid to go near a viscious snarling dog but then again, I’m afraid of any dog as I was scared by one when I was just four years old. It’s a memory that I’ve have carried with me for 56 years. The feeling of being petrified, lives within me but buried in a place that doesn’t keep me awake at night but immediately sets my hackles up when any dog of any size approaches.
That ‘One-Shot Trauma’ of a moment, a lifetime ago shaped my future. And being an all or nothing kinda person there’s nothing I can do now or in fact want to do to correct it. It’s just too long ago. Has it ruined my life? Hell-no and it’s only a mild illustration of a childhood event that subconsciously effects how I react today.
How we deal with the feeling of being afraid, makes us stronger. It shapes how we feel in different situations. For instance, I probably have more to fear in running ULTRA-X Jordan in three weeks’ time, than those that are there for the first time. Having completed the race last year, I know what’s in store for me in the race and TBH, I’m more afraid of getting on the plane than I am the race right now. Sure, it’s going to be super-tough, super-sandy but hopefully also super-exciting.
And whatever it is, I’ll adapt to the situation as there’s no point in worrying or being afraid as there’s twenty valuable days of life to live before then.
1,136 marathons - 264 Ultras - 15 Marathon des Sables - 9 GWR - 1 ULTRA-X Jordan
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