Sunday, 15 August 2021

Lose Yourself - Eminem


If you had one shot or one opportunity to seize everything you’ve ever wanted in a moment, 
would you capture it or just let it slip?

If you are risk adverse, don’t like taking chances and would never gamble – you probably would let it slip. Living without ever leaping through sliding doors, following one’s instinct or plainly grabbing the moment can leads to a very ordinary existence. And if ordinary suits you then that’s great…

 

However, for some folk, every day is a gamble. A permanent game of chance where living life on the edge is normality and where adrenalin is the driver in the need for succeed.

 

It goes without saying that it’s always best to have a balanced approach to living but what happens if you are someone that knowingly needs to change but finds change impossible. I’m often asked, ‘how do you it?’ or rather ‘how did you do it?’ as it was such a long time ago when I ‘changed’- and if I’m being honest, there was no magic trick – I just knew things had to be different and that there was a better life out there for me.

 

The concept took time to build and about eighteen months to come to the moment when I simply flicked a switch in my brain and said to myself that I’d throw away some of my behavioural processes. Sounds easy, eh? I can tell you it’s not. With a mere 5% success rate, going ‘Cold Turkey’ is a gamble that even the biggest sucker wouldn’t take. It’s a good job I didn’t know at the time as it’s an easy out when things get tough but it’s one where the folk I work with gamble and win time and time again.

 

You see there’s definitely something about ‘projected success’ if there is such a thing and being accountable to someone else that’s been there, got the T-shirt and has succeeded. Okay it’s hard excluding something that, we love, desire or depend on in some cases and it takes time to escape our demons. A time where we can feel loss, loneliness and a lack of direction. I found replacing addiction with a low level of daily exercise (when I started) really helped and as I reduced my element of daily risk of relapse. I felt calmer and in a far more stable state of control.

 

Twenty-seven years on and I’m still living life this way, using my own philosophy to get through the ups and downs of daily life. When I started out on this journey, folk thought I’d lost my marbles – in reality, I made a life-changing decision that would become life-changing for many other people too.

 

Coming out of lockdown, it’s worth taking a few moments to consider and recalibrate your thoughts and actions as we head towards the Autumn of 2021 and think about the future. I’m someone with first-hand knowledge of ‘Your Health is your Wealth’ both in a self-inflicted way and by cruel chance. My advice it to lower the odds of losing out on the greatest gift you’ll ever have and look after yourself. 

 

It’ll give you the brightest future you could ever imagine.

 

And as Marshall Bruce Mathers III put so well - This opportunity comes once in a lifetime’ to which I must add, ‘so don’t f@ck it up’…

 

Amen

 

1,103 Marathons - 257 Ultras - 9 Guinness World Records - 15 Marathon des Sables

Tuesday, 3 August 2021

Big Time - Sir Peter of Gabriel


Not me, I'm smarter than that, I worked it out’ - Gabriel

How do you measure success? By how much you earn? By where you live? By how little you have to work? Or by the size and make of your car?

 

Why are we programmed to see objects as a sign of success? And hey, before you say it, I’m just as ‘signs of success programmed’ as the next person. 

 

I mean, the car thing has always got me. And It’s possibly a young man’s game and like most, I was suckered in during my sales career where a ‘Ford Mondeo Ghia X’ was perceived as the pinnacle of car hierarchy. And on finally getting my career-eager hands on the keys I found it cornered like a shopping trolley and was really an old man’s car! 

 

For the record, at only three days old it was stolen off my drive for parts and all that was left was a bodyshell in a remote field gateway that was taken away to an early company car scrapyard grave. And being success-status-driven I went to the next level reaching BMW status where you find that everyone else on the road, even though they don’t know you, instantly hates you.

 

It’s kinda sad that we mark success by the outward signs of wealth rather than by what we’ve achieved or by what we’ve done with other people.

 

You see it’s the things you can’t see that really matter. It’s not where you’ve been, it’s how you’ve done it counts. It’s experience that makes you smart and being smart leads to success. Success that you simply can’t buy and that you earn, over time.

 

If like me you are enjoying the Olympics, see what winning the Gold, Silver or Bronze, means to the competitors. For some, only Gold will do, for others a Bronze will be their life’s defining moment. Success means different things to different people.

 

Now, we are not all world beating athletes, but we can outplay our own dreams and succeed in areas we once thought were unachievable. I know – been there and got the T-Shirt…many times.

 

I found that success comes from hours and hours of training, focus and determination and if you feel you have yet to succeed in life, make a plan and start to make it happen. You probably won’t get anything tangible to show for your efforts but inwardly you’ll know what true success feels like and how it’s measured when you look back on your life in the future.

 

Amen.

 

1,102 Marathons, 257 Ultras, 9 Guinness World Records & 15 Marathon des Sables

Saturday, 3 July 2021

Freebird - Lynyrd Skynyrd


For I must be travelling on, now 'cause there's too many places I've got to see…

I mean, what is true freedom? Is anyone ever as ‘Free as a Bird?’ Have you ever felt totally liberated?

 

I meet many people that feel trapped. Trapped by addiction, relationships or career. In other words booze, people or work - or a combination of all three. Having been in that situation myself I know how hard it can be to break the cycle of depression that accompanies the feeling of entrapment. But it can be done…

 

However you look at it, it comes down to a matter of choice. It sounds harsh, but if you are seeking true freedom from any entrapment - you have a choice, either to become a victim to the situation or change your attitude and direction. I mean if you’ve failed time and time again, why try the same approach - try something different.

 

Maybe have a ‘Time Out’… it could change your whole life.

 

It could be a moment, it could be a day, it could be a month - the beauty is, you decide how long. Have a really good long think about things. Talk it through with someone you trust and think about the future as there’s a bright one out there waiitng for you. And the best part is - you choose!

 

And if you don’t like booze, your relationship or your job - make some choices that bring you the freedom you desire.

 

And take your time, as feeling as ‘Free as a Bird’ awaits. You just have to have faith. 

 

Amen.


1,097 Marathons - 10,041 Days Free

Monday, 24 May 2021

10,000 Days - It's a long time without a pint...


If you’d told me 10,000 days ago that I’d still be living alcohol-free some 27 years later, I simply wouldn’t have believed you.

Has it been hard, well if I’m being totally honest, not really. Has there been some triumphs and tribulations along the way - well of course there has, but that’s life isn’t it. And in this rather self-congratulatory styled blog, rather than projecting a perfect picture of alcohol-free living perfectness - how about I explain where it’s been tough. As that’s the only interesting part for you…

The Lost Years…

Those were in the late eighties and early nineties although I’m not sure when they really started - they just did. I just kinda lost my way, big time and let myself go. I thought at the time I was in control but in reality I became a total pratt.

Booze makes you a pratt. A pratt to yourself. A pratt that everyone else can recognise but yourself.

Giving Up

Now there’s the giving up and then the not giving up. It’s a crazy equation where the first giving up in reality is the hardest part. It took me two years to finally admit that I needed to terminate my alcohol addiction . Talk to any drinker and the excuses will just pour out. I know, I wrote most of them!

The not giving up once you’ve started giving up, gets easier though and as the day tally adds, the desire not to mess up the clean-streak helps re-build ones confidence.

Times of Crisis

Anyone thats experienced a close family death, a messy divorce or being made redundant will tell you that a drink probably helped them through when the going got tough. I’ve experienced all of those situations in the last 27 years but have held fast and not reached out for the emotional crutch.

Times of Joy

Now you’d think this would make abstinence easier but in fact it’s a really dangerous time as our culture associates celebration with a drink. I mean, what would a Grand Prix or FA Cup Final be with a nice Cup of Tea instead of a bottle of bubbly. 

Mindset

What I have learned is that it’s down to mindset if you want to get through this or any other life-threatening situation you might find yourself in - and that’s where I’ve succeeded - if you can call it a success.

Projection

The legacy, if I can call it that, is that from my experience I can project some of that mental conditioning to others - that’s been the best part of the whole process.

Where it goes and how that grows, well keep watching this space as it’s part of my life now till the end of my days and I clock up my final number of days. In the mean time, I’ll keep going, keep running and keep on changing lives, for as long as I can. 

Amen.

10,000 Days' Dry - 1,092 Marathons etc.

Thursday, 6 May 2021

Countdown to Success - T10,000 - 17 Days


When speaking about Mental Health we often talk about ‘being in a dark place’ when things have gotten tough. Having been in the blackest and darkest of places where there was no ‘chink of light’ or ‘light at the end of the tunnel’,  it’s hard to describe the true fear and helplessness of the blackout. It’s a very lonely place and even in a vast crowd or large city, it’s easy to feel alone.

Yet somehow the light comes. They say it’s always the darkest just before the dawn. Maybe its just a way of saying that things only start to get better when they’ve been their worst - something I can wholeheartedly agree with. In my experience letting the light, changes everything. The loneliness disappears and the impossible becomes possible. It only takes a spark to reignite the flames to warm the soul.


Take it from me, ‘Letting in the Sun’ will not only just brighten your own world. You’ll find it radiates out and opens doors and opportunities that you’d never thought were possible. Maybe start looking forward to a new dawn, the brightest and sunniest dawn you can imagine. One that will 'Let in the Sun.

9,983 Days - 1,079 Marathons - 255 Ultras 

Wednesday, 5 May 2021

Countdown to Success - T 10,000 -18 Days


It’s okay not to be okay. I know that as 9,982 days ago, I certainly wasn’t okay. Does waking up feeling paralysed from the inside knowing that things will just be the same at the end of yet another day of inner turmoil and conflict sound familiar? It was the knowing that there was no escape from my inner thoughts and self-hatred that drove me to the brink of what I call my ‘Point Zero’.

At ‘Point Zero’, the place where nothing, and I mean nothing, could ever get worse, i finally asked for help. It’s the moment where I ‘reached out’ - only in reality it’s way past the point where I should’ve. Looking for friendly eyes or the listening ear of someone that could find the light in my darkness felt like defeat.

 

The thought of calling one’s Doctor or confiding in a work colleague would’ve felt like failure, especially if one’s demeanour status has been projecting ‘fine’. Back in late 1993, I’d spent months being outwardly ‘fine’ but in fact was dying inside. It was only in January 1994 that I finally found the strength to reach out and make life-changing decisions of career, relationship and behaviour that would shape my entire future.

 

On doing so, I immediately felt back in control, relieved both mentally and physically as well as feeling positive and excited about my future. It was still okay not feeling okay as I knew it wasn’t going to last forever - it was over and it immediately felt more like a temporary blip where I could decide how and when it would finish.

 

It was even okay not to be okay when I was ill with Guillian-Barre Syndrome back in 2016. Being able to reach out for medical help and support and break my predicament down into bite-sized chunks really helped my whole recovery process. And true to form, it worked. It wasn’t perfect, but then nothing ever is, is it? It was just down to adopting a fresh state of mind. One where I realised that my world had more than one occupant.

 

In both cases, I found that I needed help from other people - a need to reach out and confide. A definite no-no in my earlier life but one now that I’m happy to say I’ve fully engaged with. Soldiering on, putting on a brave face, endeavouring to deceive everyone including yourself is a recipe for disaster and if that’s where you secretly find yourself today. 

 

SHOUT and SHOUT LOUD, to those around you that matter or are willing to listen. It could be the best thing you ever do.


9,982 Days Alcohol-Free - 27 Years of Success - 1,089 Marathons

Thursday, 25 March 2021

Biggest Ever Loser...


I'm so happy that I have a new Biggest Loser in my Coleman Coaching Clients Portfolio. Since June 2020, Miss D has lost a massive 48.1kgs (7.6st) so far. And with 15.4kgs (2.5st) still to go, I'm keeping Miss D's identity under wraps until she reaches her goal of losing 63.5kgs (10st) - That's when the world will hear how during lockdown someone took the opportunity of upping their game and changed their life forever.

As you can tell, I'm super impressed and already amazed at the transformation that Miss D has undertaken both physically and mentally , whilst many people in the UK have lost the plot and found the biscuit barrel, whilst working from home during Covid.

Miss D is one of many success stories and you might seen how recently, Mitchell and Richard also upped their game.

Mitchell

Richard

Now, if you've slacked and stacked in recent months and want to shape up please contact me and find out how I can help. 

Marathons 1,083  Ultras 255  9 Guinness World Records  15 Marathon des Sables